BigGameHunt.net Hunting Forums

[moderator]

These were waiting in my email box this morning. Apparently just west of the Twin Cities on Oct 1st, this buck jumped off a bridge into the oncoming vehicle.

Luckily the driver was ok and nobody injured.

[ This Message was edited by: moderator on 2002-10-03 10:48 ]

[bitmasher]

:eek: Wow! Wonder why the deer jumped off the bridge? Never heard of such a thing in my life...

[ChesterGolf]

I read in another forum that the deer was scared into jumping by another car going across the bridge. What a waste of a great animal.

[expatriate]

Interesting. These photos made the rounds down here in Alabama like it happened around here. But our trees are still way too green. Other photos in the series showed the rest of the deer (a nice buck) lying in the front seat, with his head by the driver's seat. As noted, the driver got away with just a scratch on his head. Don't know about his laundry, though.

No doubt PETA and Defenders of Wildlife would jump all over this as evidence that the planet is striking back at the evil plague of SUVs. This deer obviously attacked the Durango on a kamikaze mission on behalf of our Earth mother Gaia.

As patriots, we should seize the initiative and strike a preemptive blow at this terrorist species. We should launch a fall offensive targeted at senior members of terrorist cells scattered throughout the woods. Bear in mind, I firmly believe that deer as a whole are peaceful and should be protected. But obviously some of the more radical horned factions pose a threat to our society and must be dealt with -- preferably by small, stealthy teams that take the battle to them. Strike a blow for freedom!

[ This Message was edited by: expatriate on 2002-10-30 00:02 ]

[bitmasher]

Quote:
No doubt PETA and Defenders of Wildlife would jump all over this as evidence that the planet is striking back at the evil plague of SUVs. This deer obviously attacked the Durango on a kamikaze mission on behalf of our Earth mother Gaia.


Obviously...

HA HA LOL...

[bitmasher]

By God you are on to something Expatriate!

These deer are not just striking back in the name of Gaia, but are in fact trained mercenaries of PETA.

It is so clear to me now. Earlier this year PETA sued the NJ wildlife department because of a deer/car collision that occurred there. In fact, NJ was the covert staging ground for training of the deer mercenaries (deer-mercs) to then be deployed throughout North America in the ultimate fight to liberate Gaia. But then the experimental training program went horribly wrong when the deer-mercs began attacking PETA vehicles! Realizing they were really in deep $hit, to cover up the monstrous attack program PETA members destroyed what deer-mercs could be found then sued the NJ wildlife department to throw off any possible investigation. Clever....very clever....

Unfortunately, some deer-merc's escaped captivity and have made their way to Minnesota!

Hear Expatriate's call fellow hunters! The deer-mercs are on the loose and seeking new targets daily. The blight must be stopped!

[expatriate]

I hadn't thought of that, but I have to agree! Take a look at New Jersey's gun laws and a pattern starts to emerge. But I wouldn't be so quick to assume that PETA has withdrawn its support of the deer-mercs. This could simply be a case of fratricide. After all, a deer's color vision isn't that good and it's possible they may have hit the wrong car. Too bad PETA's against genetic engineering and animal experiementation, or else they could fix that problem.

But by pressing the lawsuit, PETA can distance themselves from their creation and claim plausible deniability.

Sportsmen in the West should be particularly alert to this threat. If it spreads to other species, we could see weapons of mass destruction like moose and grizzlies on our nation's highways, or perhaps mass attacks by herds of antelope.

[Chuck]

Oh crud, I'm gonna go buy about 50 of those whistling thingy's that scare deer away, and put them all over my truck!

Wanna hear a good one?
There was an article I read last year that claimed the PETA people was giving thought to a way of giving the deer BIRTH CONTROL! :grin: :grin: :grin: Can you believe that?

I was rolling in tears over that one!
Just to think that they would inhibit population growth at the cost of being able to feed thousands on the meat they would waste by not hunting them, but keeping them from getting pregnant!

Let's see them put a diaphragm in a deer, or a condom on a buck! :grin: :grin: :grin:
Better yet, they should give them sex ed, and teach them to be abstinate!

[expatriate]

Birth control for deer? What a hoot! I doubt that any species that enjoys rubbbing against tree bark would go for something that lessens the experience. Aside from that, haven't these people figured out that deer don't have opposable thumbs?

But they're also neglecting the social effects birth control would have on deer -- rampant promiscuity, rise in STDs, prostitution, and breakdown in the social order. There's more to this than a doe's right to choose.

[ This Message was edited by: expatriate on 2002-10-30 07:56 ]

[moderator]

Yes, I got a group of 4 photos as well and 2 of the photos we didn't post, because they showed people that may not have wanted to have been on our web site.

We also doctored the front shot of the Durango a bit to blur out the license plate number. It was definitely an MN plate not AL. Although I'm sure the deer-mercs could be anywhere by now.

[moderator]

With regards to deer contraceptives. There was a bit of discussion and an article that discussed it in relation to other issues here:

Wanted: More Hunters

[bitmasher]

Rumor has it that birth control is just the tip of the iceberg in PETA's plans to have deer "self control" their population.

Currently they are working on a new plan code named operation New Light. New Light's primary goal is to introduce religion to deer. This new deer religion is reported to be called: Gaianity.

The core problem with deer is that their society is ordered around rampant promiscuity. Therefore being a good Gaian requires that Ms. Doe Brighteyes and Mr. Buck Bigantlers be wedded in heavenly bliss in order to please the Earth Mother. Furthermore one of the Gaianity's most important tenants is monogamy upon marriage and abstinence before marriage. Partaking in a promiscuous relationship is strictly forbidden by commandment of the Earth Mother! Mr. Bigantlers must not stray and chase single Ms. Longshanks in the heat of the rut! Failure to return home to Mrs. Bigantlers, will assure eternal damnation in a hell so filled with fire and brimstone, even Dante would quiver at its wickedness.

On the other hand, strict adherance to Gaianity's tenants will assure an eternal place in the Holy Forest with the Earth Mother, upon timely death. Please note that the Holy Forest should not be confused with Eden. In Gaianity, Eden is a bad place, where animal flesh was consumed!

The combination of project New Light, birth control, and RU-486 (the French are already gearing up for big time sales) for deer will certainly bring the deer population under "self control". And it is so, because the Earth Mother conceived it.

What can you do as a hunter to stop project New Light? Break up these religous congregations. High level intellegence reports that PETA is also using food plots (well... well... well...) to aggregate unsupecting deer and then convert them to Gaianity. Be careful fellow hunter! Intellegence also believes the food plots are doubling as training grounds for deer-mercs. Mixing religion and militarism seems to be a common theme these days.

Good plan on the whistling thingy's, Chuck. Be forewarned though, recon reports that mule class deer-merc have been outfitted with counter-measures. Ear plugs!

[expatriate]

Wow! You can't get deer theology and metaphysics on just ANY website! In light of your posting on gainity, I feel I should retract my fratricide theory. I think you might have it right, Bitmasher, when you say the attack on the PETA vehicle was deliberate. This could reflect fundamentalist gaian sects within the deer population that got wind of PETA's plans to spike their fodder with RU-486. Obviously, such a fundamentalist group would be incensed by the cultural erosion posed by such a threat.

I got to wondering about the deer-mercs, and noticed another odd coincidence between the New Jersey and Minnesota attacks. Do you suppose there's a deer-merc link behind Toricelli's sudden withdrawl from the New Jersey senate race or the mysterious death of Minnesota's Paul Wellstone? Both were pro-choice Democrats.

[ This Message was edited by: expatriate on 2002-10-30 22:53 ]

[bitmasher]

Hey man, I'm just reporting what I hear, the guys in Intelligence do all the work...

No, No your fracticide theory holds water. The idea of PETA taking friendly fire from deer-mercs just has a pleasant, make-you-feel-good sound to it. Even if the sect in question was pissed over the spiked fodder.

That is an intriguing set of events with Wellstone and Toricelli, one would would hope the collusion does not go that high up, but given history it certainly is within the realm of possibility...

[expatriate]

There's only one species I know that can achieve sufficient altitude to take down an aircraft in flight -- and that doesn't bode well for the Christmas season.