9 replies [Last post]
Offline
Joined: 07/11/2006
Posts: 139
Man Rules

We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules! Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put
it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining
about you leaving it down.
2. Sunday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the
tides. Let it be.
3. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
that way.
4. Crying is blackmail.
5. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints
do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!
6. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every
question.
7. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's
what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
8. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
9. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In
fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.
10. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
11. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the
ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
12. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it
done. Not both. If you already know best how to do! it, just do it
yourself.
13. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during
commercials.
14. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.
15. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
We have no idea what mauve is.
16. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
17. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like
nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the
hassle.
18. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an
answer you don't want to hear.
19. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is
fine... Really.
20. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or monster
trucks.
21. You have enough clothes.
22. You have too many shoes.
23. I am in shape. Round is a shape! .

Thank you for reading this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the
couch tonight, but did you know men really don't mind that, it's like
camping.

Offline
Joined: 12/04/2006
Posts: 4
Man Rules

Thumbs up

Offline
Joined: 11/16/2006
Posts: 153
Man Rules

yo that's funny!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Offline
Location: Wandering the World, Currently at Ft. Campbell, KY
Joined: 10/05/2006
Posts: 206
Man Rules

Good ones....wonder what the wife would think if I posted it at the house Laugh

Offline
Moderator
Location: Florida,USA
Joined: 08/21/2003
Posts: 1566
Man Rules
halvtaz wrote:
Good ones....wonder what the wife would think if I posted it at the house Laugh

I was thinking the same thing.............sooooo... since you brought it up first, you can try it and report the results back to us so we'll know what to do or not to do !! neener!

Location: Colorado
Joined: 07/08/2006
Posts: 260
Man Rules

Thumbs up

Offline
Joined: 12/04/2006
Posts: 39
Man Rules

thats a good laugh,ok a REALLY good laugh but men don't show ur wives lol Big smile Big smile Brick Wall,) Shame on You! would of advice LOL

cowgal's picture
Offline
Moderator
Location: Colorado
Joined: 03/10/2002
Posts: 1787
Man Rules

I highly recommend you NOT post those rules guys!

We may just come up with some rules of our own! neener!

Offline
Moderator
Location: texas
Joined: 04/23/2006
Posts: 484
Man Rules

my wife thought some of them were funny. She has been expiosed to my sense of humor for too long.

Offline
Joined: 08/27/2004
Posts: 1964
Man Rules

LMAO Thumbs up

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